Regret

I'll do a more thorough post on this at some point, but i'd just like to say: getting myself deep into Chelsea's defence has been a massive regret that may have cost me my Champs league slot. Obviously there have been a few mistakes, but losing Joe Hart and Vidic has not worked out in my favour....

X-KentHouse KnockOut

So, with the league obviously not even remotely important, it's time to turn our attention to the Knock-Out cup.

After the exciting group stages, 4 teams emerged for the semi-finals:

Marrocco Villa

THE SCIENCE MASTERS

The Winwinwinnerteam

Mass Confusion

One semi-final is done and dusted. The Science Masters have mastered the Science of Fantasy, and defeated Mass Confusion with a game to spare (49 points (plus Silva still to play) vs 41 points), and will be in the final against either Marrocco Villa or The Winwinwinner Team. Marrocco Villa are sitting on 50 points with Kolarov and Yaya Toure still to play, while The Winwinwinner Team have an impressive 63 points, with Huth, Kolarov and Silva still to play.

So it looks likely to this pundit that THE SCIENCE MASTERS will be facing The Winwinwinner Team in the final of the X-KentHouse KnockOut, and anything could happen in the final week.

Trophy

Just received the trophy, not the one I ordered due to 'stock problems'. But it will do!

Engraved with X-Kent House Premier, and stands a lofty 12 inches. Its actually pretty heavy as well, thought it would be as light as a feather.

The Testi' Times of Antin's Allstars

Often I think about how making a fantasy football transfer is like putting my balls out on the table: Sometimes I do it because it feels right even if logic tells me otherwise, sometimes I do it because its obvious, sometimes I do it out of pure desperation.

Lately I feel like i've been putting my balls out on the table and the universe has been smashing them with a Thor like hammer.  I make decisions out of what seems like sensible logic only to find that I'm going to take an even bigger shot in the baby maker.

The fact is my balls aren't close to being what they used to be.  In quiet moments I will reflect on how I used to be able to present them with aplomb - knowing full well that while others winced they would admire my moxy and respect the results.  But now as I produce the shriveled old sack that used to be champion conkers I'm resigned to a life of indifference from my peers and self loathing. 

Don't get me wrong - I respect only few of the balls being shown by my competitors.  The real prize set of grapefruits can be seen by the inevitable champion of the X Kent House Premier.  However much JC spit shines those veg of his, he just doesn't have the stones of a winner.  Those my friends belong to the Moroccan timeshare of one Lukas Holden.  Let me tell you - I'm watching Lukas' balls... and I aint hating what I'm looking at!

Tactics VS Luck

This topic is always something that springs to mind, either when a substitution has been made or wildcard played (and in the comments section of Scott's post, about captaining a player). This happened to me last gameweek (Gameweek 35). I substituted DirkKuyt for Clint Dempsy and captained him; for me this was a tactical substitution, made to help me conquer the 13 point deficit between Mass Confusion and Marrocca Villa. And in my eyes it turned out to be exactly that (some would say pure genius), with Dempsy not playing and Kuyt gathering 13 points.

Why would I not captain Dirk Kuyt with a history that looks like this?

However, when sitting back and bathing in the realisation that Marrocca Villa had taken a 4 point deficit for nothing to happen, I quickly thought that I had been on the receiving end of 'a move of pure genius' before. There is one major difference though... I didn't think of that move as pure genius, but a mere spot of luck.

This has sprung to mind before when others have made captain choices. Most notably when 'The Science Masters' had J.S Park as their captain getting an astonishing 30 points (if I remember correctly). Now to me that is pure luck, but to Scott it may be a move of pure genius.

When do you consider it a tactical change or a lucky change? If I've made the change, it's always tactical but if I see somebody else making the change, it's definitely luck!

Or do you make your own luck in this game?

JC

Does Captain Choice Matter?

I'm not sure my captain choice has always been quite right. Let's look at my last few weeks choices, and compare it to the 'form player', the 'expensive player', and the 'in hindsight player', and of course, the point scoring machine; 'Nani'.

Gameweek 35.

My captain: David Silva

Reason: No-one else has him, he's my favourite Man City player, he's at home to WHam. It was him or and everton boy, but I don't quite trust them enough, other than Baines, and I don't really like captaining defenders.

Results: 90 minutes, assist, 2 bonus points (7 points)

Highest Form Player (in my team): Leighton Baines. 11 points (Captained Difference: -8)

Most Expensive Player (in my team): Wayne Rooney. 1 point (Captained Difference: +12)

Highest Scoring Player (in my team): Leighton Baines. 11 points (Captained Difference: -8)

Highest Realistic Player (in my team): David Silva. 7 points (Captained Difference: +-0)

Highest Scoring Player: Simon Davies (Who?!). 16 points (Captained Difference: -18)

Nani: 2 points (+10)

Outcome: Silva lost out to Baines, but as said earlier, I don't like captaining defenders. So of the players I had this week, I probably made the right choice. But a poor week regardless. Shame I don't have any liverpool players...

Gameweek 34.

My captain: Etherington.

Reason: Few other teams seem to have him, and he has a 'Taiki' (double-week).

Result: 102 minutes (3 points). No assists, no goals, no nothing. Better than Zamora, but barely.

Highest Form Player (in my team): Baines (9.0). 2 points. (Captained Difference +2)

Most Expensive Player (in my team): Rooney (11.9). 2 points. (Captained Difference +2)

Highest Scoring Player (in my team): Cech. 8 points. (Captained Difference -10)

Highest Realistic Player (in my team): Van Persie. 7 points. (Captained Difference -8)

Highest Scoring Player: Maxi Rodriguez. 21 points. (Captained Difference -36)

Nani (Highest Scoring Player of the Season): 3 (Captained Difference 0)

Outcome: Should have chosen Van Persie and got an extra 8 points. But I decided to back the player with a 'Taiki'. But VP was on definite form, having scored in the preceeding 3 games. However, he doesn't show in Form or Value, either of whom would have lost me points.

Gameweek 33.

My captain: Terry.

Reason: Has a 'Taiki'. Chelsea's defence should be able to cope with West Brom away and Birmingham at the Bridge. Practically guaranteed 180 minutes. Known to get the odd goal and assist.

Results: 180 minutes (4 points). Conceded a goal in each week. (I'd also put Cech in...)

Highest Form Player (in my team): Van Persie (7.7). 13 points. (-18)

Most Expensive Player (in my team): Rooney (11.9). 2 points (+6)

Highest Scoring Player (in my team): Baines and Van Persie. 13 points. (-18).

Highest Realistic Player (in my team): Van Persie. 13 points. (-18).

Highest Scoring Player: Malouda and Drogba. 22 points. (-28).

Nani: 3 points. (+2).

Outcome: I should DEFINITELY have put Van Persie in as captain and got an extra 18 points. Form said to put him in, and he had a 'Taiki'. But I didn't trust him or Arsenal against Liverpool and Spurs. I thought Chelsea were more likely to keep a clean sheet. And I was wrong. I could aslo have kept my original plan to get Malouda in, and get myself an extra 28 points, which would have completely justified the 4 point deduction. But I didn't know that he was back. Terry still seems like a justifiable option, even if it didn't remotely pay off... Would have been better to put my form player as captain, but not the value player.

Gameweek 32

My captain: Asamoah Gyan

Reason: At home to West Brom, Sunderland's only real striker ought to get a few goals.

Results: 90 minutes and an assist. 5 points.

Highest Form Player (in my team): David Silva. 1 point (+8)

Most Expensive Player (in my team): Carlos Tevez. 1 point (+8)

Highest Scoring Player (in my team): Van Persie. 12 points (-14)

Highest Realistic Player (in my team): Van Persie. 12 points (-14)

Highest Scoring Player: Peter Odemwingie and James Collins. 15 points (-20)

Nani: 11 points.

Outcome: Should have picked Van Persie at home to Blackpool. This was the week i'd transfered VP into my team, having tired of Defoe. But who was to know it was going to be the start of a terrific run of form for the Vice President of Arsenal? (VP, gettit?) I did better than if i'd picked my form or value player, but still didn't get it right.

Gameweek 31.

My captain: Nani

Reason: At home to WHam, United should rip them open and make them have their children, and Nani should be integral to that.

Results: A freak injury in the 4th minute. 1 point.

Highest Form Player (in my team): Charlie Adam. 1 point (+-0)

Most Expensive Player (in my team): Carlos Tevez. 6 points (-10)

Highest Scoring Player (in my team): David Silva. 10 points (-18)

Highest Realistic Player (in my team): David Silva. 10 points (-18)

Highest Scoring Player: Wayne Rooney. 17 points (-32)

Nani: 1 point (+-0)

Outcome: Well, you can't play for injuries in the 4th minute, can you? Maybe I should have picked Silva, but would you expect City to beat Sunderland 5-0? I guess it's not too unexpected really, but I didn't see it coming. Picking form would have had the same result, value would have been a better choice.

Gameweek 30.

My captain: Jermaine Defoe

Reason: At home to WHam, having just score 2 goals against Wolves, Defoe ought to score a hatful. In the past seasons he has been known to score in fits and spurts, so when he showed his shooting boots I got balls deep into him.

Results: 90 minutes. 2 points.

Highest Form Player (in my team): David Silva. 2 points. (+-0).

Most Expensive Player (in my team): Luis Nani. 9 points (-14).

Highest Scoring Player (in my team): Charlie Adam. 15 points (-26).

Highest Realistic Player (in my team): Nani, 9 points. (-14).

Highest Scoring Player: Charlie Adam. 15 points (-26).

Nani: 9 points (-14).

Outcome: Defoe was a bad choice. Oh well, i still think the reason was justifiable. Should however have picked Nani or Adam. Form wasn't a worse choice, ignoring Value was. I didn't think Adam would necessarily perform, having missed the last two games, but of course Blackburn are woeful, so maybe I could have seen it. And Nani is almost always reliable, especially against mid-table teams like Bolton. Oh well.

----------------------------------------------------------

Having looked at the last 6 weeks, let's total up some numbers, and see how I fared.

Totals:

My captain's total points: 22

Form player: 30 (-16)

Expensive player: 21 (+2)

Possible Perfect Pick: 69 (-94)

Realistic Perfect Pick: 58 (-72)

Absolute Perfect Pick: 106 (-168)

Nani: 29 (-14)

Outcome: Short story: I've done badly. I've done better than if i'd just picked my most expensive player each week. But with 106 possible captain points available, i picked up just 22. That's not really good enough. Obviously, that would have required doing the right transfers, as usually I didn't have the best player of the week in the team. But even allowing for that, I've missed out on 69 points that I could have had by picking a better player from the team I DID have. Even just picking Nani each week would have got me an extra 14 points, which at this stage of the season could prove crucial. But what to take from this? Do I keep going with my hunches, or go with the 'form' player in the future? Tough decisions.

Well... live and learn? Later I'll do this for the whole season, but it takes much longer than i'd expect.

Developer

Possible changes and additions to the site will be posted at http://fantbantdeveloper.blogspot.com/

JC

The most important week of the season?

As the season draws to a close on this pretty topsy turvy affair that we like to call the X Kent House Premier it's safe to say that time is running out for bridging the gaps and competing for the top spots.  

For long periods of time this league has been average - 50 point weeks could elevate you to the top whilst 20 pointers would not punish you as harshly as they should.  But since late January we have been blessed with some glorious results both on the pitch and in the world of Fant.  Julian "The Rookie" Campbell gained momentum from his WC and rose to the top of the pile against fathomable logic.  Joe "How are you win win winning?" Cameron fell from grace after contracting a fantasy transmitted disease.  Then there was Lukas "I have Odemwingie" Holden - who quietly constructed a deadly team to prove that quality choices lead to quality results.  Meanwhile Scott "I don't care that much about Fant but I play 5 transfers a week" Bissett felt the harsh reality of endless point deductions and a lack of concentration on upcoming fixtures and has fallen closer to the pointless Europa League competition between myself and Taiki "Doubly Weak" Endo.  

But let us take the chance to gaze at the Fant table and get a real look at the competitions that are heating up:

#	Team	Manager	GW	TOT
1	Marrocco Villa	Lukas Holden	103	1812
2	Mass Confusion	Julian Campbell	71	1785
3	The Winwinwinnerteam	joe dawg	75	1738
4	The Science Masters	Scott Bissett	68	1718
5	Antin's Allstars	Cole Antin	80	1689
6	kenya 29ers	Taiki Endo	73	1655
7	Whizzard Wanderers	Marc Whitehead	71	1631
8	Athletico Barnes	Andrew Barnes	68	1595
9	Real David	David Burt	93	1531

A 27 point gap at the top will be hard to overcome for Mass Confusion, especially with a midfield that would make Mascherano proud.  It is not totally over however, with enough games to play to make it interesting if JC is up for the challenge.  

You would have to say that a 47 point gap to the rest of the pack is pretty daunting and that the real concentration for TheWinWinWinnerTeam and The Science Masters should be cementing a place in the Champions League for next season.  Evaluating that gap has become a little more relevant... 29 points separate Antin's Allstars and 4th place.  No small feat - but one that will be desperately played for with both verve and vigor.  Confidence runs through the ex challenger's blood and my plans for the upcoming weeks would make my competitors tremble if they knew.  

But that doesn't mean that I have forgotten about the non-relevant, Arsenal biased Kenyan behind me.  If he is anything like the athletes from his homeland he will be in it for the long haul.  I would like to think 34 points between us would give me the cushion I need to eliminate him from my thoughts - however this of all weeks is where his strong squad will come into play and he will be relishing the chance to live up to his preposterous self proclaimed nickname.  With the fixtures aligning, he will have his eye on the extreme long shot of the champs i'm sure.

THIS my friends is a MASSIVE GAMEWEEK.  Bolton, Fulham, Stoke and Wolves.  Four teams with extremely inconsistent histories and various league positions on the line.  Double's all around - the last real chance for a large enough points haul to pull yourself back in the race.  Backing anyone of these teams with a transfer will be risky:  Bolton coming off a massive loss, Fulham ever so hard to judge in the goals department, Stoke even more so and Wolves with more incentive than ever to put points on the board.  

So as fingers linger over transfer buttons this week - an extra minutes thought would be wise.  Your in the last chance saloon boys, and the barmaid is already starting to put the chairs up on the tables.  Time to choose your best shotgun and go down fighting.  Pain is temporary - FANT IS FOREVER (or until next season).

2 things that have amused me today

1: Q: What do you get if you cross a ball and Fernando Torres?

A: A goal kick.

2: HasTorresScoredForChelsea.com

Who from chelsea?

So Chelsea have the doubleweek of choice. But who to pick?

I've made my transfers. It's defence based. What's everyone else thinking?

Also... I must admit i'm not loving the tag-line. "Chatting Fant is all about the Bant"

Suggestions?

Bloody Manchester City!

I was having a distinctly average week, but I thought it may all be ok. I had 3 Manchester City players, where other teams just had one liverpool player. Last time they played, City won 3-0. And City were a better team now than they were then. Sadly, so are Liverpool.

I was in the car and thought, I better check how it's going. Tuned in at the start of the second half...

"City have come out looking tired and not really with it. They're without Tevez, who got injured after the first Liverpool goal".

So i'm thinking, ah crap. Liverpool scored. There goes Hart's clean sheet. And Tevez is injured. Well, i've still got my boy Silva. He's the best midfielder they have, he'll score one or two and improve my week... Then they read out the team sheet and Mancini's gone with bloody Milner! Goddamn it all! 3-0 liverpool, and city don't play next week. Bloody useless.

Time to get ready for some interesting fixtures ahead though. Double weeks and voids. I'll be taking deductions...

Out of Towners... A Plague in Any League

A league usually consists of a group of like-minded individuals, some who take it more seriously than the rest and others who give up caring, early on in the season. However, those who take it more seriously than others often talk amongst themselves about possible transfers and give bant, this is all part of the fun of being in a league. As well as these players there are what can only be considered the, 'Out of Towners'. Dangerous; is a word that can be used to describe them. Plucky and relentless could also be used.

I will take my current contender in the X-Kent House league as the example; his only slither of banter or communication for that matter I can find any trace of, is recorded on the 'X-Kent House Premier Fantasy Meetup', Facebook event, on 22 March stating, 'watch out, Odemwingies about. lets get the bant out.' Now, when this happened I considered this a useless taunt considering in the 5PL games previous to this post Odemwingie only scored 15 Points, however since the post, he has scored 25 points in only 2PL games.

Out of Towners should be considered as a genuine threat in any league and their mystery and secrecy as attributes that could take them to victory. In any case, I can see the next gameweek being very important for those of us at the top of the X-Kent House Premier.

I'm addicted to transfers

I just can't get enough. I do the wild-card window shopping. Then i'm like... yeah, but I can't do that. Or... could I?

This week i've done 3 transfers. As it happens that's only one deductionable one, but i take deductions most weeks! I've done 53 transfers in 31 gameweeks. That's the most in X-Kent House. Kenya's 29ers are 2nd with 49 transfers.

The issue is, I always feel it's a necessary transfer. And it's almost certainly not. During the next week I'll analyse this issue in more detail. Look forward to that!

(Also, i've totally gone for a stroll in the Park this week)

P.S. I hope everyone is ready for the Grand National this afternoon. I'm backing a couple of horses, but Oscar Time is my 'actual pick'.

Park Ji-Sung: Is it time yet?

I know what you're all thinking. Or at least, I know what you SHOULD all be thinking...

Is it time for a stroll in the Park?

The south-korean legend should always be in your peripheral vision. Why? Because he's the cheapest midfielder in the Man Utd team (at 4.7 million), who are currently dominating the premier league. Well, except for Obertan. And we ignore him, because he has only 284 league minutes under his belt this season.

As well as being cheap, he plays. Always a priority. Obviously Nani is the undroppable player from the Red Devil's midfield, clocking up 2174 minutes (out of a possible 2790). The next most featured player is Scotland's mighty Darren Fletcher, with 2019 minutes. Ferguson trusts Fletcher, and picks him for all the 'big' games. But he's not renowned for picking up the points. Don't get me wrong, he isn't a 2-point Mascherano, but with just 2 goals and 6 assists, he's nothing compared to Nani (9 goals, 16 assists from just 155 minutes more). Ferguson's other options are Carrick, Giggs, Scholes, Anderson, Valencia or the youth. Carrick has never really impressed since joining from Spurs, though he has recently got a run in the first team, completing 5 games in a row, but scoring just 12 points in those 5 games. He may appeal to Ferguson, but he shouldn't appeal to you. Ryan Giggs... There is no doubting that this man is a legend. He has been playing first team football for one of the greatest teams in the country, if not the world, for 20 years. Clearly, the man has quality. But at the age of 36 he's not going to be playing 90 minutes every week. But when he does, he'll do well. He's definitely an option, but an option that is too risky for my liking. I expect my players to be playing every game, for at least 75 minutes. And I don't feel I can rely on Giggs for that. Which is a shame, because he's good. He's very good. It's a similar story with the other Man Utd stalwart, Paul Scholes. He may never have learnt how to tackle, but on his day he can take on the world. He can score from range and pick out any pass on the pitch. But he doesn't, and won't, play enough for my liking. Anderson i'm sure will be good. But this hasn't been his season, with just 35 points in 804 minutes. Valencia is interesting. Since returning from injury, he has played the full 90 minutes in both games, picking up a bonus point in each, and an assist. 10 points from 2 games is a fine record. Clearly Ferguson likes him, and maybe you should too. But I may wait a little while, as at 7.8 million he requires a little more thought.

In addition, to playing, and being cheap, he's good. 56 points in 838 minutes good. Compare this with other players with similar minutes. Huddlestone has 31 points from 839 minutes, and costs 5.6 million. Blackpool's Matt Phillips has picked up 40 points in 839 minutes, but costs just 4.5 million. Anderson, also from United, costs 5.5 million and as was mentioned earlier, has only picked up 35 points in 804 minutes. If you look at points per game, Park will get 4.7 points per game. This is 12th in the rankings for midfielders, and the cheapest in the top 25 (ignoring Danny Rose who played 45 minutes last season and scored a wondergoal, thus ranking 3rd).

Certainly, if Ferguson chooses to play a five-man midfield (which he often does), you can expect to see Park on the pitch. Often he'll feature in a four-man midfield as well, but with Nani and Valencia on the wings, there is a lot more competition for the central positions. In terms of value for money, it's hard to find a better option than a certain Ji-Sung Park. And with Rooney facing a 2 match ban, it seems probable that Fergie will go 5 men in the middle, and one of them will almost certainly be Park, but beyond those two games? It's far less sure. But the two games are against Fulham at Old Trafford, then over to St James Park to face the Mighty Magpies. They are games I'd expect United to win, and there's nothing to say Park couldn't score a hattrick in each...

Just Had A Look At My Team For The First Time In Ages And I don't Like What I See. This Is Going To Be A Lot Of Eff.

Might have to take deductions. Deadline day is coming, so I thought I'd have a look at my team. So much news to digest, new injuries, a lot needs doing and I'm on a tight budget.

CA's guide to surviving the International Break

Fant - unnecessary, Bant - waning, Life - on hold!

Living without fantasy football can feel like a Rebecca Black song - empty, pointless and a need to mame and destroy. Pile on a healthy dose of irrelevant conversation about the "state of British football outside of England" and endless debate over whatever retarded decisions Fabio Capello has unrecognizably mumbled in a press conference and you've got the makings of a depressing fortnight of football news. Well, get that old lawnmower blade away from your wrist and unhook the coax cable that you've looped round the light fixing in your bedroom, and check out CA's guide to surviving the International Break.

1. Temporary time-wasting: Until fant becomes relevant again why not find alternative time-wasting web experiences? A casual peruse of youtube perhaps or get lost in an addictive flash game? Apparently the internet has other uses than fant, porn, news and chat-roulette (in that order)?

2. Going outside: Hear me out though! I know your used to dark basements, computer screen glare and the monotone ramblings of football podcasts, but going outside will help to bide the time before the next Prem weekend. You could even try going somewhere with grass that will allow you to practice the very skills that have become little more than a trading commodity for your Fantasy minions.

3. A casual gambling addiction: How about replacing the competitive adrenaline of Fantasy Football with an equally gut wrenching and heart pounding exercise like football betting? Many a lessons from your fantasy team can be taken to this arena however the art of deduction - in this case from your bank account - is one that will both teach you important lessons and disrupt the tranquility of your lifestyle.

4. Ladies love a lame loser: Rather than masturbating over Suarez turning around a lame performance with a late goal and irrational bonus - apparently ladies love a man who pays attention to their pointless stories and constant complaints. Use the time without fant to save up some lady credits so that when football really matters she may let you tell her to go "fix up some nachos bitch" while you salivate over Rooney coming within 20 metres of the football!

5. Over-prepare: If none of the above can replace the fix of fant you need - why not succumb to your urges, continually dream about what you would do with a wild-card, make 5-step transfer plans or just look at random fant teams around the web to calm the fant beast that refuses to quit.

ABOVE ALL - STAY CALM! Fantasy Football will be back in your life before you know it... wait intently and you shall be rewarded! Rejoice! For life is for FANT - and with it shall bring forth the BANT!

Waka Waka (This Time for Africa) (The Official 2010 FIFA ...

Who has it?

Draids. I'm trying to think to myself who has draids at the moment... any ideas? I think its up in the air at the moment with the international break. I think we will find out who has it in the next gameweek. I think that Taiki might have surrendered himself to draids when he named himself 'the doubleweek'.

How i imagine JC feels at the top of the league.

Could the internationals give you a lucky break?

The prem makes way for international fixtures this week, as does anything Fant related. Transfers will be put on hold, thoughts of who to captain and bench too distant, all in all its a no-show.

However, there seems to be one good reason to care about the internationals, possible injuries!

If the internationals week could bring me 3 cheeky little lucky 'breaks' I'd go for; Lamps, Bent, VDV.

Its no coincidence that these players are in JC's team, but they also represent players I feel I will have to get if they hit form. Hopefully they hit the stretcher.

The new site design.

Rather than elaborately designing a site i've gone for a very minimalist - Black & White with a hint of Orange - design.  I'm still tinkering but this will be the general gist of things.

Thoughts?  Or even better - vote using the poll?!

Buying at the peak!

No doubt this has happened to more of the lowly players languishing at the bottom, than those of us with a cunning nose for a purchase at the top. But every now and then we all do it the wrong way round. I'm talking about buying a player when they get to the top of the little form graph:

hoping they will continue to shine, and then seeing them plummet into the abyss all the while clinging on to the hope that they will perform as they once did.

I can say that even the most magnificent of players (please see my current global league standing for evidence) suffer from this curse; I'm currently stuck in the middle of this once hypothetical situation with a certain Aston Villa player who isn't knocking them in anymore. Anybody had or still have a 'buying at the peak' player?

JC

Bone to pick

Right, well firstly thanks to the computer boys for setting this up. I'm not sure how much Joe was involved, and I'm not sure if he would be considered a computer boy, but thanks anyway. So am I being led to believe that this site is what is to become a lucrative set-up and a go-to for all future Fanters(?) to banterz. Hopefully it will be.

Bone to Pick

a) Why am i getting so much stick for the awesome nickname 'Double Week' when there are stronger contenders for the most imbecile of monikers in "The Champion of Capua" and "An Ocean of Coin". Sorry? Take a dose of Charlie Sheen did we? AYO. topical.

b) Anyway, to stick to the topic- fant- bonus points, or bone, has given me serious ball ache. I thought it was a myth at first, but there really is a citizenship bone for English players. There are so few teams, except foreigner Arsenal, who have never had one of their English players getting boned. Case in point, Everton vs. Fulham this past weekend. 3, 2, and 1 Bone was allocated respectively to Baines, Murphy and Hughes (http://fantasy.premierleague.com/fixture/153.html). Don't know if anyone watched the match (in Kenya we get ALL matches), but Murphy and Hughes? Get out. Coleman and Dempsey were clearly awesomer.

c) I think Kim Deal was addressing Charlie Adam when she sang 'You're a bone machine'. It's annoying. Why is he so good? Big fish, small pond, I guess. But he's had 43 bone points. That boy gets boned. Hard. And 6 of his 9 goals have come from penalties, 1 from a free kick and 2 from open play (correct me if I'm wrong), which all leads me to believe that it is a grave error not to have him. Nevertheless, Fulham away and Arsenal at home don't look too appealing, and in my position of vying for mid-table, I do need some differential, so it may make sense to hold off on him till his run of 4 home games. What do you think Capua Champ?

Notes From a Champion

To sum up my current feelings regarding fant, I have decided to evoke the wisdom of Dr.Dre; "I'ma giant, and I ain't gotta move till I'm provoked. When I see you, I'ma step on you and not even know it"

And here I am. The current champion, two time winner of fant, a metaphorical fant giant, stirred from his pinnacle at the top of fant mountain, poised at the precipice of failure.

'Why?', I hear you ask. Well, the answer lies in what can only be described as a 'plucky' effort by some of the league members, most notably Julian 'An Ocean of Coin' Campbell, who has been riding his luck harder than Roon rides grannies.

Hopefully the natural order of things will soon be restored and I can regain my rightful place at the head of fant.

Next Post: Relegation battle heats up at the bottom between CA and the Doubleweek.

CA's stat book - Episode 1:AAR

AAR (Awesomeness Above Replacement).

AAR is all about taking a trip to Awesomeville with the right player at the right time. Its a means of assessing fant talent by eliminating prestige and points and deciding if a player will come through for you when you need him most.

For example Van Persie's AAR is about a +4 when considering league average strikers for the amount of minutes played and the general flair and consistency he brings to the table. He defies oppositional considerations and becomes a banker even when faced with elimination from every single competition football can throw at Arsenal. He is not a man but a champion of awesome and about 4 points better per game than plugging Darren Bent in your team and takin a trip to Average Town.

CA OUT

Lets get crackin'

I'm metaphorically taking my hat off to you Joe, hopefully this is the first step to a full www.fantbant.com url. Somewhere to go to release all my fantasy banter other than xbox live.

I'm hoping that it takes off, especially next year when I will have to defend my title.

JC